Big Kitty in a Big State

July 28, 2013- Fort Worth, Texas

            Because I lost my debit card and credit card, I found myself a little stuck in Texas.  Thank goodness those boys helped me out, because at least I was able to make it to my destination for the day: to Ashlee and Nate Gomez’ home in Fort Worth, Texas.

            For those of you unfamiliar to Texan geography, Fort Worth is located just west of Dallas.  I got there in the evening and Ashlee/Super-Mom instantly pulled out some delicious risotto pre-made meals from her freezer and I had some din-din.  Thanks Mom!

            I was greeted by such friendliness every where I looked.  Her children, Savannah and Allie were already in bed, but Savannah got up to say hello.  Her kitties, Luna and Big Kitty rubbed their faces on my ankles, begging for attention.  Luna was actually one of my kitties for a while. 

She was one of the kittens that Matela had had back in 2005 and I kept her for about 3 some years until we moved into Gabrielle’s when I was forced to find a new home for her.  Luckily, I found a great home for her with Ashlee who, during that time, was alone in her little Riverside apartment since Nate was off doing some military duties.  (Not sure on those details).So it was a lovely day to see her again, and to reunite her with her momma and brother, Matela and Darcy.  Unfortunately, they did not recognize their kinship and hissed at each other as if to say, “Hsssssss, thanks for abandoning me mom!”

“Hsssss, you’re the one who left me, bitch!”  And then they ran away from each other.

            After an evening of catching up, it was time to hit the Texan hay.  Ashlee and Nate went off to bed and I was left to get ready for bed in the restroom near the guest bedroom.  I washed my travel weathered face and went to brush my teeth only to find I had left my toothbrush in the other room. 

            I opened the door to find that friendly Big Kitty, the enormous alpha male main coon that had previously been rubbing all over me. 

            “Meooooow!”

            “Hi Big Kitty!,” I cooed to him as I reached my hand out to pet his face.

            “Meooooooooooow!,” he replied with a  little wild spark in his eye…. “Hsssssssss!”, he warned me.

            Whoa!  Friendly cat just went crazy!  I stood in the bathroom doorway a little unsure about why his demeanor shifted so abruptly.  My first instinct was to butter him up, “Hey, remember me?  I’m the one with the great ankles!”

            “Mrooooowwww…” he responded darkly….

            I shut the door between us so I could think.  This was so weird!  This cat was standing guard of the door!  How would I ever escape to the bedroom??  I thought maybe I would have to sleep in the tub…  No!  I did not travel halfway into the country just to set up camp next to a toilet!  So I called out to my friend…

            “Ashleeeeeeee,” I half whispered so as not to wake the children…. 

            … no response…

            I cracked open the door to peer at the cat without threat of him lunging in to kill me!  He looked up at me with wild, angry eyes and meowed again.  I shut the door quickly!  Suddenly his claw bearing paw shot out from under the door!  This was like The Shining, and soon this cat is going to find an ax and get me!

            I didn’t want him to think I was afraid of him, I had to be boss.   So my next tactic was to scare him.  I grabbed a towel, opened the door, and swished it in front of his face to shoo him away.  He dodged the towel, and hit it with his paw; claws snagging at the cloth and dissipating the threat of the scary towel.  Crap!  I closed the door again….

            I found a piece of an old PB&J sandwich on the floor.  One of the girls must have left it there for me to use as bait.  I picked it up, cracked open the door and let the cat sniff the yummy food.  “Mmmmmm, you like that?  You want it??  Go get it!”, I threw it away from the door in hopes Big Kitty would be hungrier for dried up bread over delicious me.  Only his eyes followed the bread, and then they looked sternly back up at me.  “Meoooooow,” he said as menacingly as ever.

            I tried the same tactic with a little squishy bath toy.  Maybe he wanted to play.  No… And then some paper I found on the floor… Nothing was working and I had been in that bathroom a near 10 minutes!  I was starting to lose hope!  Ashlee was asleep, I was running out of resources to free myself, and Big Kitty was practically marching back and forth behind the bathroom’s threshold.

            I peeked again, and to my joy and surprise, Big Kitty had gotten bored and wandered off into the kitchen!  I made a mad dash for my room.  Free!!!  … except I still hadn’t brushed my teeth…  

I considered going to bed all gross, but this was a rare night that I wasn’t stuck in a public Walmart bathroom; I needed to go back into the fire, so I grabbed a weapon: a plastic bag.

            As soon as Big Kitty saw me again and began to approach me, I cocked my weapon and shook it loudly and abruptly in his face.  He was out of there faster than lighting streaking across the mid-western sky.  I had won the battle!  I brushed my teeth and went to bed, but I kept that plastic bag nearby just in case the wild animal came back.  

            The next morning, I left my room gingerly,  half expecting Big Kitty to be there waiting for me again.  But he seemed to have forgotten the whole ordeal.  It wasn’t long before he was back to rubbing his face on my ankles in purry ecstasy.  It is this neurotic and unpredictable behavior that leaves the average person to question the legitimacy of cat-friends.  But I am not the average person; I accepted his rubby apologies and had no other dangerous confrontations with Big Kitty.  I passed my initiation.